Did you ever watch the game on the Price is Right called "That's Too Much?" Well the producer at EIEIO might just have played that game a bit too long.
The beginning of a new year is not only a time to clean the windshield to help see things coming at you a bit more clearly but also a time to make sure you have enough fluid going back to your rear window as well. The crazy volatility of the market makes it a bit prohibitive to buy the good washer fluid so you stock up on the less expensive stuff that still relatively does the same job. Now that your vision is clearer, it's time to get back to the game and decide whether it just might be time to shout out, "That's too much!"
For those having trouble catching up to my weird way of thinking, I'll make it a little simpler. How long is too long to give financial help to your grown children? To me, that's a bit like asking how the Internet works and how it is possible to pick up a phone and speak with someone in Africa? I will never know much less understand.....but that doesn't mean I shouldn't try. So I went on the Internet (that I know nothing about!) A recent survey by Merrill Lynch studied 50K respondents over four years. 84% said they would like to educate their family on ways to be more financially independent, while 70% said hey would consider cutting back on support to post-college children. I'm assuming post-college means after college....period... whether they studied (yeah right) for one year, one semester or even one month :-/ Among those who contributed to those adult children, the average amount was $6,800 a year..WOW!
Let me digress a bit. I had a very generous Dad but nothing was expected! I never asked for financial support! His generosity always came as surprise gifts when the mood struck him. (Here was a guy who always gave us gifts on his birthday!) These gifts had no timetable and could have been $20, $100 or $1000. When each unexpected and gratefully accepted envelop appeared, (sometimes on my car seat, or back door or even in the mail) it was accompanied by words of wisdom (written on a used piece of paper or an old envelope) and might say something like......."I have much and you are young and struggling. It gives me great joy to be able to help you in some small way. Use this wisely and I trust your judgment and your choice" Always signed, Love, Your Dad.
Back to the present. So as I aged and had children of my own, some of which I should have eaten, I have tried to pay it forward. A down payment here, a house there..(WTF)...................????? I thought I was doing a good thing while helping them, making Dad proud at the Pearly Gates Golf Course and keeping the welfare and best interests of my kids and more importantly my grandkids at heart! Resuming the game.... I think it's time to say, "That's too much!" The game will end and the player will either win the prize or just be grateful that she had the chance to play at all. Either way, she'd have done her best to get on stage.
Now the bigger question, When has it been too much for too long? That would be now. Now I know what the hell the phrase "The Buck Stops Here" really means...or at least my interpretation. It literally stops here.... 2019 will be an awakening of sorts. I have tried giving financial advice but it has fallen on deaf ears (no. not Lee's.) So this year, Mom or Gramazon has my granddaughter has dubbed me, will be the Keeper of Books....the checkbooks. You probably have surmised that the bottom fell out of the market for one child and the negotiated contract (literally) put me in charge of finances after a government bailout of sorts!
So far, so good. My reservoir is relatively full and the windshield is clear and clean. My rear view is visible and allows me to know I no longer wish to go in that direction. I have a clear conscience that my sanity must come first, my grandkids welfare is dependent upon it and unquestionably, Mother knows best because Father knew best♥
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