Sh-- Happens

Sometimes even your favorite magazines just plain run out of things to write about.  Thankfully, because of that....I won't!  One of my top 5 magazines is the relatively new HGTV magazine.  I think my TV's just automatically display HGTV when I turn them on.  The magazine has innovative ideas from paint colors, to fabric patterns to turning flea market finds into EIEIO treasures....especially this month.  I may just be turning egg baskets into pendant lamps before you know it.  The other day as I was eagerly perusing my latest edition, I flipped upon an article about bird poop.  Yep, a beautiful picture of a blue jay's lower torso and a lovely photo of a blue (and poop) patio umbrella.  I doubted there was a decorating tip hidden in the prose and I was pretty sure we weren't turning the poop into anything else but it had peaked my curiosity.  Nobody can ever again say "I don't know sh--!"  I'll now inform you all so you too, will never hear those cruel words.

Newsflash,,,,,, birds have only one hole! ( I think we broached that subject before in one of my chicken seminars but it bears repeating) So... both pee and poop make the trip together...the white is mostly pee and waters down the brown and green poop.  Hey, knowledge is a beautiful thing.
Birds' metabolism is so revved up, they often take as many as 50 bathroom breaks a day. ( I can relate)
Bird poop cannot hurt you....unless, of course, a flock of geese (or seagulls..speaking from experience) decide to "potty" while flying over you sun bathing on the beach.  Large quantities could cause fungal infections for those with weakened immune systems.  Beware San Franciso and the Ithaca Commons.
Bird Poop is acidic....it can eat away on furniture finishes and even etch and erode glass. Yuck! Soap and water usually does the trick to "eliminate" the dirty birdy crap but they DO make a product called .......wait for it............Poop Off.. that you can purchase at your nearest Petco store.
Bird Poop has one redeeming quality.  It has wonderful, natural nitrogen which can act as a fertilizer for your garden........but it's doubtful you can train your feathered friends to poop precisely over your petunias and actually straight from the pooper won't really do much. It is available in the composted state much as you'd buy chicken manure (got that too.)

So, there you go....No one can ever again accurately tell you "You don't know Sh--!  and if they try... well...Sh-- Happens!