Words

Reading and writing are two of my favorite things, of the non-human category!  Lately, the words have been sucked out of me and quiet time floods me with memories that run down my face and bring thoughts of happier times.  So many emotions make me weary:-( 

I read this yesterday:

       Words are singularly the most powerful force available to humanity. We can choose to use this force constructively with words of encouragement, or destructively using words of despair. Words have energy and power with the ability to help, to heal, to hinder, to hurt, to harm, to humiliate and to humble.

It's our choice how we choose to use them!  I have not always made good choices.  I'm sorry....mostly.  I was born without a filter. Generally, that bodes well for me. I'm seldom second-guessing what I should have said because I actually said it!! I never purposefully say something to hurt someone. In my head (and then out my lips) I am confident that whatever I uttered was exactly what they needed to hear.   Sometimes, in hindsight, it was more of exactly what I needed to say! Either way, I usually felt better.  Now, after 6.5 decades, I'm trying to think a little more and say a little less.  It's a work in progress and I'm not sure I have enough remaining decades to perfect it..but I'm trying.

Some words I do love to say are "Thank you", "You're welcome" (that would not be YOUR welcome,) and "I love you!"  The last three were never offered much growing up. It was only in the last years of both Mom and Dad's lives that they flowed freely!  I'm thinking it was just something generational.  I try to say it often and I NEVER say it if I don't feel it. I tell my kids, (the ones who'll listen,) my grandkids and my good friends.... because if I say it....I mean it.   I have a deep affection for many but I love many too. Blood IS thicker than water...and this is why! It's a misquoted saying that most use to justify choosing family bonds over the bonds that we make by choice. Well, guess what folks?  It means exactly the opposite!  The actual saying is "the blood of the covenant is thicker than the water of the womb"  Those words actually mean that the bonds you've made by choice are more important than the people that you are bound to by the water of the womb. HUH! So now we know that those words reflect the fact that the bonds you choose for yourself can mean much more than the ones you don't have much say in!!!  I already knew that but now I have validation.  It's almost parallel to the never-ending nature vs. nurture debate... but that's a subject for a different day.

Today I say "Thank you" to those who follow me and put up with my ramblings. I'll try to do better in the future...for everyone....after all, blood is thicker than water 💓😉

Slacker

Yep, I'm a slacker.  I was a faithful blogger for years and now I 'm lucky if I get to (remember) post every couple of weeks.  I'm usually very relaxed when I post or very stressed... Unfortunately, for the past few months, the stress has trumped the relaxed.  I don't really want to just vent here every time so I silently (or not) just stew.

Today is a relaxed day.  It was a great weekend full of birthday, Easter and Fools.  Saturday I celebrated with Lacie and Jeff fixing lobster and my favorites for my birthday.  The Walter crew was here to join in the fun.  Our table conversations are always a hoot!  Bailee was able to join us too so that was an added treat!

Yesterday began with the Easter Bunny arriving and hiding the eggs.. ( even if I did tell Jett that Santa had been here ;-) Picked B back up at 7:30 and the search began when Jeff, Lacie and Jett arrived. Both kids were successful in finding their eggs, 12 and 20 respectively!  Bailee deciphered her word puzzle and retrieved her basket from the H-A-M-P-E-R!  No Julz this morning :-(

We all chowed down on Easter breakfast with eggs, bunny muffins, fruit and THREE meats... no vegetarians here!!!!  The Jeff Hatfields headed home to rest up for their Easter at Mima's, Papa off to shoot and B and I chilled with some clean up and a few hands of gin rummy. When Papa returned, he and B went 4-wheelin' for a bit.  Not a very warm day but a lovely one!!!

Round 4?

It has seemed for decades, there was always a snow storm on Saint Patrick's Day.  Now we seem to have one every few days. I'm not really complaining! I have no dislike of winter or snow (maybe ice.)  Spring will come in due time and flipping a day on the calendar won't make it so.  Just like being 17 one day and 18 the next doesn't make you an adult!  I don't know if it's global warming or Lake Ontario, pollutants or Mother Nature. No matter the reasons, who cares?  I guess I can be ambivalent about the weather because there really is no place I have to be! I have a nice big vehicle that has 4 wheel drive and I can usually get myself to breakfast, the post office or the store.

A brand new foot of snow over the past 36 hours hasn't dampened my spirits. The sun is shining today and the girls are off to Syracuse for a sleepover and to see Kinky Boots!  More snow is predicted for next week and they're calling it a "Foureaster!".......this will actually be....nor'easter # 4 within 2 weeks.  I'm fairly certain it will all melt in due time and we'll be crabbing about the mud, the rain and the heat.  We should just face the fact that Mother Nature is fickle, we're complainers and at our age.....we should be thrilled we woke up.

What will be will be and these kiddos have still never seen winters like we had.  You know the ones where we walked 15 miles to school and wore bread bags inside our boots to stay dry!  Now those were nor'easters!

Projects

In an effort to be the one who keeps me happy, I generally must have a project.  They're usually hazardous to my wealth (or lack thereof) and they usually drive my family or my carpenter crazy.  Ultimately, along with various vendors and stores, I do make others happy.  I'm pretty sure I could single-handedly keep Amazon, Hobby Lobby, Michaels, Lowes and Ebay in the green in the stock market world!!!

Last year's projects included my new fireplace and JimBob.  Lots of folks won during these projects.  Winter's nearing the end and spring is on the horizon.  JimBob will be hauling a brand new load this spring and preparations are underway for greenery and more (Thanks Jeff.)

 If that planning weren't enough, A couple other projects popped up with a new addition to EIEIO.  This one will be fun to complete and everyone will reap the rewards... It could be a work of art for sure...

Lots of folks who reach retirement age look forward to having nothing to do.  When I stop needing projects, I probably won't be breathing...and I've already completed those projects;-)

Just a reminder

Last week a friend posted a picture of herself after a lengthy open heart surgery (several years ago). From that day forward, she learned to live in the moment and never count on tomorrow. She began to live her life in such a way that allowed her to do what she wanted when she wanted and why she wanted.  She paid her bills on time, didn't squander her money and did what made her happy.  She raised two thriving children, found the love of her life and was happy.......and continues to be happy.

I pondered her post for the rest of the day.  At the end of the day, I decided that if I wanted an inground pool for my family and me to enjoy, I was absolutely getting one!   Called the gal at the "pool store" and said "yes!"  Will it be expensive? Probably...Will we love it? Hopefully...Could we live without it? Maybe! Will we enjoy it? Absolutely!!!!!!

During the 80-90 degree summer days I would sit quietly in my den with the doors closed and the AC running.  I am not a fan of the heat.  Now, I will float in my heated pool, watch my grandkids getting exercise while having fun, have my family here more often (Grandma's hidden agenda) and wonder why the hell I didn't do this years ago before the cellulite served as my life jacket! 

I did my pros and cons list and the pros won.  I might have actually MADE them win but who cares. By Memorial Day (hopefully) we'll be treading water and floating the days away... It's a Win-Win for me or maybe just a Swim-Swim.. either way, my dime, my time!!!

I'd rather be Ready.......

The sage advice I've always remembered.......I'd rather be ready and not go than to go and not be ready.  Mentally, I'm not ready, Physically, Meh! but financially...Take that Medicaid!!! I'm ready!  Jeff is now the sole owner of EIEIO.......with lifetime use for his aging parents, of course! Now, when the eaves need cleaning or the patio furniture needs to be moved, I'll just make a call and remind him...."It is your house!"

Along with the property transfer, we have new wills, new POAs and new Health Proxies.  We're good to go, literally!

What really amazes me is the number of folks who have no exit strategy.  It really makes no difference whether you have a lot of money or just a little. What matters is the fact that you will make your demise a little less stressful for your family that stays behind.  If you have small children and you have no will, you're just plain an idiot.  If you're comfortable with the courts and a judge dispersing your assets and placing your children, then skip all the hoopla and go ignorantly into the world.  Every day I sound more like my father... (that's not such a bad thing!)  Along the way, I'm trying to teach my children the process.  50% isn't bad :-/ You can lead a horse to water............but if outside influences bullshit the horse into thinking it's not thirsty..... oh well...dehydration begins.  Maybe the drinking the kool-aid will work for them!

I'm completely comfortable with my decisions. I made my pros and cons list, consulted those in the know and signed on the dotted line....a lot!

Now, to enjoy what comes next.  I think it involves water!

The Blame Game

Another school shooting:-(  Life goes on but this came closer.  Seventeen people, students, teachers and innocent bystanders, were murdered in cold blood on Valentine's Day.  One of these victims was a close friend of a friend.  Chris Hixon was the athletic director of the High School in Parkland, Florida where a crazed teenager murdered 17 with full premeditation!  For a grueling hour, children were barricaded in their rooms, under desks, crammed in closets listening to the deafening shots that murdered their friends and teachers. The killer had pulled the fire alarms and thrown smoke bombs to draw the students and the faculty from their rooms.....grouping them into running, accessible targets! One student was atop a pile of others and bled out while another had their face blown off. Graphic, you betcha!!!!! and so much so that we should not forget....not next week or next year or ever...The number of shootings has almost become normal...It should never be accepted as anything but violent and murderous and certainly not an everyday (or month) occurrence!

Then as quickly as the shooting stops, the blame game begins.  The media, who I've grown to almost hate throughout the last 12 months, cries on screen and pleads with the President and lawmakers to "Do something about it!"..."Save our children!"..... If there were a horrendous plane crash, they'd be pleading for more air safety measures. If there was a tornado, FEMA, climate gurus and lawmakers would be chastised for not predicting or preparing or allocating enough funds.  IT'S ALWAYS SOMEONE ELSE'S FAULT!  Uhn uh!!!!   It's our fault.  We wait for others to take a stand, we wait for others to donate, we wait for others to fix it..... The ones we're waiting for are the ones we elected.  Forget party affiliation, forget "sides", forget finger pointing.... Look in the mirror, stand up tall and blame the one who can ALWAYS make a difference..... US!  We can't and won't change the world but we can help to change NYS, we can help to change Cayuga County, we can help to change Moravia and we can help to change the focus around our very own dinner tables.  Harry Truman was a pretty smart fellow. He knew the blame game was played without rules and never had a winner but always had a loser.  Let's remember "The buck stops here!"