Advice!

Advice:   a recommendation regarding a decision or course of conduct. It's origin is from the French phrase "ce m'est a vis..meaning" * it appears to me!  The operative word being ME.  There sure is a big difference between being asked for advice and providing it without invitation.  Either way it's generally just an opinion wearing advice's clothing.. ( *.)  "What would you do?" is usually an accident waiting to happen.  "What do you think" is an entirely different animal.  Oddly enough, I get asked these two questions often.  I sparingly answer question one.  I become rather vociferous if approached with question two!  I pretty much preface my answer to number two with, "If you really don't want my opinion, don't ask the question."  I often ponder the sage advice that says, Never ask a question to which you don't already know the answer!"  Disregarding children for the moment, I think 90% of the questions I've been asked (in an advisory setting) are asked to just confirm what someone already knows, approve of what has already been planned or affirm an action already taken.  Wouldn't that make me clergy of some kind?  I am humbled when asked for advice, thankful when I think I can help and terrified to point anyone in a concrete direction.  But, ask me what I think and it's a whole different ballgame.  Batter up!  Strangely enough, sometimes people don't even have to ask;-)  You know, opinions are like a--holes, everybody has one.  Bottom line is, if you don't want mine, don't ask.  I'd like to think that in that past 63 years I've acquired a little bit of knowledge on what to do and a whole of what not to!
Advice is relative.. Mr. Webster also believes it is counsel, guidance and input.  Those are words I can manage. I can add my input, hope it has guiding value and trust that legal counsel is not an end result.


Go ahead....................ask me now;-)

Me, Myself and I

The Eagle has landed

I finally decided to investigate the nest yesterday. While it is still way too snowy and way too cold for me to take any feasible form of transportation directly to Eagle Point, I did take the warm way out and park along the road with my camera and binoculars in hand.  I pulled as far onto the shoulder of the snow packed road as possible, flipped on my hazard lights, rolled the window down enough for my lens to zoom and located the nest.  There it was, that big beautiful white head.  No idea from that distance if it was Millard or Abigail but I really didn't care...The sit in had begun!  Later, at suppertime, Abigail came for dinner and a spent a bit of time gathering nesting materials. She grabbed some swale from beside the stream (it's a ditch but I prefer to call it a stream as it houses herons, ducks, geese, beavers and muskrats) and worked tirelessly pulling out a few old cornstalks to take back to the nest.  Following shortly behind her was Millard who appeared pretty hungry too. They both seemed to have their fill of venison and returned to the nest for nighttime... Our temperatures don't appear to be conducive to any kind of incubation so I am hoping that eagle body heat will do the trick.  If she has laid the eggs, we should be seeing chick heads pop up within the next 25-35 days.... 35 from the date they were laid is the incubation period. I fear they may freeze if they have been in the nest for longer than a couple weeks. I am now extremely anxious for some warmer temps to settle in.  The leaves help to camouflage the nest and protect the babies as well as shelter them from the elements. 
I really need to get the drone going and practice a bit so I don't  crash it or kill them. I would need extensive therapy should that occur and I doubt my health care covers burder by drone.
Will keep you posted on things at the birternity ward!

Abigail :-)

Luke's Way

Soap box Monday.  Just a little background to begin.  You all know how I feel about the rigidity of Common Core and testing. The multitude of worksheets, practice tests, real tests and tests before they've even actually learned the information drives me a little crazy.  Now let me take you to a time and place where education is a joy.  The time is still right now, the place is a private school in Virginia and the subject is freedom to educate.
Our cousin's grandson, (who probably is a 3rd cousin twice removed on paper but holds a special little place in my heart) was given a project by his teacher called Amazing Animals.  They were to research an animal...( or bird) and make a presentation to their class.  Luke's project was the Bald Eagle.  Luke's Grandma and Grandpa live here in Moravia and through Face Book, phone calls, emails and visits, had told him all about two of our local favorites, Millard and Abigail.  While our students are being trained in the correct way to fill in bubbles on a  test sheet, Luke and his classmates are LEARNING by doing... What a novel idea.


What our kids are learning:
Sit quietly in your seats.
Read all questions carefully
Fill in the bubble with the correct answer
Fill in the bubble again...neatly this time (Bailee) as it won't count if it's outside the oval.
Disregard the sunshine pouring in your window
This test doesn't count toward your report card grade but it may determine whether your teacher passes or fails.
Disregard the fact that some of your classmates have "opted out" of their tests while you bucked up and didn't !


What Luke and his classmates are learning:
Research....Internet, library books, visits to the Zoo...etc
Presentation styles.... oral reports, power point, drawn pictures, photos
Public Speaking
Social Skills
Interviewing
Science... classifications, life cycles, food supplies, weather, animal reproduction, hibernation...etc
Organization and planning
Neatness
Social Studies.....where the animals live now and the origin of their species
And more and more and more........All while having fun!


Now I see no need for the skills of a brain surgeon or a rocket scientist to know that anyone would want their child, or grandchild, to learn Luke's way.  This third grader has mastered life skills from just this one project that will stay with him forever. Bailee has learned that bubbles are no longer fun! How very sad :-(

Be careful what you wish for.....

Lately all the talk has been weather and when will winter end. It has been an extra long season of arctic cold and plentiful snow. For weeks, folks have been counting down the days until the calendar says "Spring."  Seriously, what does a calendar know? Two days ago Mother Nature (and Lake Ontario) gifted us with nearly a foot of fresh, white snow.  Yesterday she made us shiver with below zero temperatures once again.  Everyone was pleading with their inside and outside voices, "please bring us Spring."


Be careful what you wish for.......................I cried Uncle and confessed that I, too, was over the beauty of winter white and ready for spring.....so I googled spring, just for the hell of it and this was the third picture presented.


Maybe when we wish for spring, this is what we get: So, what do you do when Mother Nature hands you lemons, you make lemonade. I'm always looking for a spring project, usually outside, but this just might do the trick.  There is no shortage of artwork, photos or greeting cards this time of year and this may just be the perfect décor for an accent wall.  So, rather than bitch about the snow, which is actually falling again as I type, I will be heading to the second hand store and finding "Spring" there.
If the mountain won't come to Mohammed, then Mom will go the mountain. Spring will soon be in the air........................and on the wall !!!

Before I go

I read an interesting article yesterday written by a hospice caregiver.  She wrote about the 5 biggest deathbed regrets.  Each was eye opening and relative to each of us:

1. People wished that they had been truer to themselves.  They wish they had done what they really wanted to do rather than what was expected of them.  I think this is much more relevant in the past generation. I know that my Dad wanted to be a sports writer and he would have been amazing. He knew teams and coaches, plays and contracts. He knew the whys and why nots and the impacts of dollars on deals... Let's face it, he knew everything........but he sold feed..and oil...and spent his entire life working with his father who was pretty much not someone he (or anybody) could make happy. He did what was expected rather than what he loved. Sad.
2. They wish they hadn't worked so hard. Every single male she cared for expressed this regret. Women also voiced regrets but the fact that the majority she talked with were from an older generation, more women had stayed home and raised their families. The men realized that they could have lived with less to be with their families more.  I am extremely thankful that I was able to stay at home, raise my kids, participate in community and be part of Lee's business without the 9-5 restraints.
3. They wish they had had the courage to express their feelings. I'm really good on this one. I've never had an issue saying how I feel.  If I dislike you, you probably know it.  If I love you, you probably know that too and if I disagree with you, you absolutely know it!  I can't change how people will react to what I say but most will know that with me, sugar coating is only on my doughnuts!
4. They wish they had stayed in touch with friends.  I'm making up for lost time. Yay Face Book and thank you Mark Zuckerburg for giving me a venue to reconnect, share stories, break bread and reminisce with those I have loved for decades.  No regrets here now!
5. They wish they had let themselves be happier. Shoulda, coulda, woulda...................Happiness is a choice only you can make. Many folks from past generations were burdened with a fear of change.  It was easier for them to pretend to others that they were content...(ie: Buzz/Hewitt Brothers.)  I say to my friends, my kids and anybody who will listen, YOU are the only one who can make you happy. It's your choice!  Do not die with this regret....many things in life prohibit options.....happiness isn't one of them. Happiness can be scrambled eggs for supper or filet mignon, going to movie or reading a book at home, skydiving or kite flying.... All your choices... Lucky you!

My Grandpa always said, "I'd rather be ready and not go then to go and not be ready!"  So get ready everybody because we're all going....be true to yourself, slow down and enjoy, say what you think, call your friends and most of all, Don't worry, BE HAPPY!!!!

Due Date

I'm pretty sure we're getting ready to be grandeagles.  The sun is rapidly melting the snow and the other day Millard was working on nestorations over by their "lake house."  I was intently watching thinking that he was working on removing parts of a prior buffet but then he came away with some swaley looking stuff that looked to be perfect nesting material.  I haven't seen them together in a few days and there is certainly enough venison to share.  That could mean that she is preparing to lay her eggs if she hasn't already.  The snowmobile has made the trek to Eagle Point but I have yet to journey through the knee high snow... That's just a bit too much like exercise!  It takes about 35 daysfrom the laying date to hatch and that would put it mid April.  If the eggs are laid 2 days apart, they will hatch in the same time frame.  I'm not much of a four wheeler either so I need my path to be mostly snow free and hard packed...I'm thinking asking for black top is out of the question!  I am, however, contemplating locating the motorhome next to the inlet to have a bug free, potty accessible, upper deck bird's eye view of the spring event.  I think it's a perfect idea and I only have a few more people to persuade! So far, I'm batting 1000 on my persuasion tactics.
You know I'll let you all know as soon as I see a tiny, ugly gray head pop over the nest or maybe........I'll be able to operate that drone and we can have real eagle eyes on our babies. (Just my luck I'll crash it into the nest and kill them all ;-(



To be continued.........................................................................................

What does it MEAN?

What does it mean ...to be mean?  Are we all mean at some time in our life?  Is it normal? What does it mean if it makes us feel good? More and more we're hearing stories about people being mean...not just kids but everybody. This morning there was a story on the Today show about a rather large fellow in London who was ridiculed for dancing... seriously, dancing?  Bullying appears to be the number one "bad deed" in schools these days.  It's been around a very long time. "Sticks and stones will break my bones.............," but it seems that much of this generation has lost its respect...or maybe never had it. Respect is not a inane quality. I think it's definitely an acquired trait and one you foster through example. We're ALL guilty of seeing something different and thinking, "wow" or "really?" but we never really say the words out loud.  Today the filters aren't there....nobody ever put them in place. We can blame the fact the traditional family is waning, two parents must work and therefore family time is limited, values are not reinforced, teachers (who bore the burden for years) have only time for testing to the test and then giving it and God has been hacked from everything because it's not the time or the place. All good excuses but excuses nonetheless. 
A perfect example is the recent basketball game held at Watkins Glen High School last week. Mean personified.  Generations of mean permeated the entire event. This mean couldn't even be disguised as school spirit. Our athletes were amazing.  Everything right about raising kids, teaching respect, student athletics and sportsmanship has been instilled in our kids... That didn't happen accidentally. It's generational in our neck of the woods. When push comes to shove, and it did, our boys were brilliant. Their fight was on the court and they fought hard. Their fight ended there and they were powerful under pressure. Those teenagers exemplified every single quality that had been instilled in them by their families, their teachers and their coaches. They were the recipients of everything mean for four quarters and were the bigger men for leaving it on the court.....even when they were unable to leave.  If it takes a village to raise a child, it means ours is doing a pretty fine job!

Dear Diary

Who doesn't love research? Some enterprising scientists decided to delve into the benefits of writing. What they found was not surprising, at least to me.  The only thing I love to do more than reading is writing. Yay for me as their research appears to prove that writing about yourself and your experiences or opinions is healthy... Wow, for once we're learning about something that IS healthy. Writing about oneself can improve mood disorders, reduce medical symptoms while actually improving your health, reduce doctor visits and even boost your memory!!!   (Now what was I talking about...?)
Researchers found that writing about yourself and then rewriting with a positive spin actually made the writers more positive, progressive individuals.  Students became more academically sound, specific socio-economic groups became more successful and even married couples resolved conflict by writing about their conflicts as neutral observers. A Duke professor summed it up by saying, "These writing interventions can really nudge people from a self-defeating way of thinking into a more optimistic cycle that reinforces itself." 
I write in a journal daily.  I have for several years.  I also write this enlightening, entertaining and informative blog :-) several days a week. I still have my diaries from my teenage years. I read them often. Life was simple, problems were few and times were good. I'm definitely an apple that fell off a narrative tree.  I have found journals from my great grandparents, my grandparents and my parents.  I'm pretty sure they never intended them to be read decades later but the prose, the anecdotes and the history are priceless.  I've read everything from daily weather forecasts and courting disasters to little men at night and big men in politics.  These family litanies were never rewritten and never researched and probably only appeased the idle time of the writers.  Somehow, putting pen to paper (or now fingers to keypads) is extremely cathartic.  I too, do not rewrite a story or entry for purposes other than grammatical correctness. but if asked to reflect about what I've written and possibly come up with a new "more honest" assessment, I could probably do it.  I'm not sure the  words would change all that much but the outcome just might.  I have always professed that you are the only one who can make yourself happy.  Maybe by re-examining what I write and how I say it, I can be happier too. WTF, I'll give it a try and apologize in advance to the future generations who may believe I must have been an opinionated, old, son of a bitch!

Testing.....again

Here we are again... The great test debate! Social media , at least locally, is all over the "opt out" discussion....almost ad nauseam.  I get it! I absolutely do....but I have some issues with actually not taking the test. I wholeheartedly disagree with the whys of Common Core testing and the uses of the data. I agree that so much time is wasted on the practice tests and the actual tests that basic learning (and loving to learn) is becoming a thing of the past... (which just may come to bite the proponents in their future asses.)  I do not, however, have a problem with actually taking the test.  I'm a bit scattered in many ways with the entire issue but in my opinion (which I generally share freely and usually no one solicits) opting out is copping out.  I get the grand picture. The whole numbers thing and we can't stop it if we don't all rally but the opting out message is not the one I want to teach my granddaughter.  "Take it, do your best, don't stress and move on!"  They needn't  know any more than the results of their test will not go against their grades and if they do their very best, nobody will ask for more.... OK, they'll ask but that's an issue for another day!


Testing, testing..1...2...3, testing.... I'm not a fan of testing.... any kind of testing.  I know, I just said 50 words ago that I wouldn't want Bailee opting out of testing.  So I must love testing...NOT..It's the getting out of doing something hard and unpopular that I disagree with. In my humble opinion, testing proves very little.  I take one of those silly tests on Face Book nearly every day. ( I know I have too much idle time.suck it up buttercup..my time's my own)  According to the results of these highly educational exams, I have a PhD, am close to my sister, am a wonderful cook and love purple....Wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong.  See, tests suck.  but I took them and filed the results right where all grades should go...


So here's hoping that the great Opt Out Debate will soon be over and we can move on to more pressing things like spending $50,000,000.00 on a new skating rink and horse arena rather than funneling it into education. It's all about priorities folks.  I've obviously been watching way too many episodes of House of Cards.

Happy Birthday Doc!

Today we celebrate Dr. Seuss's 111th birthday.  What a legacy to be quoted and read daily by millions of children (and adults.) I am a fan of literature...often the simpler rather than the obscure. I believe poems should rhyme.  Usually one poor recipient at Christmastime receives the traditional poem explaining their strange gift, sending them scurrying on a scavenger hunt or just commemorating a special time.  Every other line will rhyme and have equal syllables.  Often I have to reread the poem out loud so the intended effect becomes clear.  Obviously I appreciate my poetic acumen more than the receiver......which I never hold against them;-) 
In juxtaposition to Theodor Geisel, my words of wisdom are seldom remembered.... Here are a few of his:


1. “Today you are you, that is truer than true. There is no one alive who is youer than you.”
2. “Don't cry because it's over. Smile because it happened.”
3. “Unless someone like you cares a whole awful lot, nothing is going to get better. It’s not.”
4. “A person's a person, no matter how small.”
5. “Today is your day! Your mountain is waiting so get on your way!”
6. “You're never too old, too wacky, too wild, to pick up a book and read to a child.”
7. “Adults are just outdated children.”
8. “The more that you read, the more things you will know. The more that you learn, the more places you’ll go.”
9. “Oh the things you can find if you don’t stay behind!”
10. “With your head full of brains and your shoes full of feet, you’re too smart to go down any not-so-good street.”
11. “You’re on your own. And you know what you know. And you’re the one who’ll decide where to go.”
12. “Sometimes the questions are complicated and the answers are simple.”
13. “You have brains in your head, you have feet in your shoes. You can steer yourself any direction you choose.”
14. “If things start happening, don’t worry. Don’t stew. Just go right along. You’ll start happening too.”
15. “So be sure when you step. Step with care and great tact and remember that life’s a Great Balancing Act.”
16. “If you never did you should. These things are fun, and fun is good.”
17. “I have heard there are troubles of more than one kind. Some come from ahead and some come from behind. But I’ve bought a big bat. I’m all ready you see. Now my troubles are going to have troubles with me!”
18. “Will you succeed? Yes! You will, indeed! (98 and 3/4 percent guaranteed.)”
19. “You do not like them. So you say. Try them! Try them! And you may!”
20. “And turtles, of course… all the turtles are FREE. As turtles and, maybe, ALL creatures should be.”




#6 and 11 are favorites of all,  Dr. Seuss is the man you should certainly call. He'll answer your queries and give you advice.  He'll give some options, both naughty and nice. You can take 'em, discard 'em or just plain ignore but for sure you'll be smiling forever and more!!!...


                                                               Happy Birthday Doc!