Graduation... grade 5?

I remember when Jeff's Junior Prom was in view... Everyone was buying fancy dresses (not Jeff,) ordering tuxedos and renting limos.  Jeff was on the shit list of his pals...(or maybe it was their mothers) because he had no desire to spend his (or my) money frivolously!  I was impressed with his decision, others were not.  This meant that by simple division, the others would have to pay more....sorry :-(  His comment, at the tender age of 17, was, "What will I have to look forward to if I do it all now!"

Fast forward 21 years.  Last week Bailee graduated from 5th grade....seriously?  Several years ago, against my objections which literally meant nothing, the powers that be decided it would be a great idea to move the 6th grade to the Middle School (high school bldg.)  These children still can't decide if they want to pull pig tails or pranks, use iPads or mini pads or frolic or flirt. One thing they don't want to do is write silly notes in cursive....because they were never taught!!!!!!   Anyway, that's another whole gripe.

These days, there are ceremonies for graduating from preschool, Kindergarten, 5th grade, 8th grade and then high school.  Ceremonies, programs, awards, music, celebrations every few years sure take the excitement out of graduation..... Which in my day, nearly 50 years ago, was a pretty big accomplishment rewarded with earned pomp and circumstance.  If you've already had four, it becomes old hat!  Kind of like a limo for the Junior Prom.

We have truly become a society of reward.  If you pee in the potty, you're rewarded, if you learn to ride your bike, you're rewarded, if you pass your Regents, you're rewarded and if you get your driver's license, you're rewarded.  everyone gets a ribbon at the Science Fair, all get trophies for soccer, certificates were given to each baseball player and awards were given for being kind.......really?  To the extreme, college students are given days off and pizza when they become so troubled over the recent presidential election that they can no longer function without therapy. I'm pretty sure that one of these Halloweens, everyone will be donning their pussy costumes.... after all, that's what we're promoting.

I am not purporting that we raise military trained kids but rather respectful ones who don't need a reward for completing a test or running to first base!  Kindness should have a self reward that needs no certificate. Verbal congratulations and  encouragement throughout the year should be common place in education and pride in your work should be the unseen trophy.  Teaching respect and responsibility while not teaching grammar and cursive seems a juxtaposition of responsibilities.

5th Grade graduation was nice but unnecessary.  Hopefully their sights will be set on HS graduation  while making themselves good listeners, kind classmates, respectful students and ambassadors for successful adults.  They will soon be our doctors, lawyers, plumbers, electricians, accountants and caretakers......and they will be rewarded with what they have learned.....and so will we!

soccer, certificates are handed out for being kind

Top Ten....or more

Face Book has it's slew of interesting (and sometimes downright ridiculous) advice and info. The other day there was a top ten list of regrets you don't want to have in your old age. Here they are:

1. Not playing with your children (I'm still playing with them 35 years later...the games are different and so are the rules)
2. Working too much (I'm safe)
3. Afraid to say I love you. (I have NEVER said those words to anyone who hasn't earned them....never.... and I say them daily to kids, grands and friends I adore!)
4. Caring about what others think..... (really good to go on that one)
5. Never taking risks (Possibly negligible risks as a teenager and financial ones as a young adult)
6. Bad relationships  (guilty of a few.. learning experiences..some much longer than others)
7. Not traveling  (Travel has never been a priority on my bucket list.  I like home!)
8. Not spending time with parents (wish I had had more)
9. Not quitting (I generally knew when to quit and when to hang in there..... this is a toughie)
10. Realizing your beauty (Ehh... Beauty was never an important thing to me.... I'll take intelligence and humor over beauty any day)

Thankfully, at this advanced stage of my life I regret very little.  One of my biggest regrets is not using the talents that I believe I have.  I would love to have taken college courses that would stimulate my writing. I do not regret leaving college....not one bit!  College in 1970 was all about pot and collecting large amounts of money to pay untalented college professors. (ie: my Language and Thought professor at RIT always came to class with various colors of hair dye covering the large and very visible bald spot of the entire top of his head. He would take us canoeing and hiking...??? I withdrew from the class a month in...... I received a B+.....he obviously didn't miss me!

I have a couple of other regrets that are best left untold. Some could still be rectified but to the good of the whole, better just left as is!

Fortunately, I have never had the stress of not saying what I think or doing what I should.  I have some disappointments but they have little to do with regrets.....we all do.  Life is short and looking back won't help now.  I impart what little wisdom I have and hope that those within earshot listen. That I do not regret!

Who will remember?

It's been a long, few years and an even longer few days.  Mom began the final steps of her journey two weeks ago. It began with what was thought to be a tummy bug and ended up being the brain's miscommunication with many of her day to day "internal conversations!" No swallowing on Wednesday and therefor no nutrition and hydration.  Comfort care began in earnest that day. The days passed, day one, two, three, four, five, six. seven..... Then on day eight, the Cheyne-Stokes (rapid breathing for several seconds followed by many seconds of apnea) breathing began. Everyone said this would begin the final hours.  Not for this ole gal... three full days and nights! A hospice nurse I contacted asked me Mom's age. I replied, "95."  She explained that in her experience, the older they were, the harder they fought.  They didn't get to be that old accidentally.  After all, her Mom nearly made 102.
Good byes had been said, gentle allowances had been given to make the trip, great grands had snuggled and kissed her and the adults had explained that the bar was open in heaven and happy hour was under way....She still hung on till she was ready..... what a strong body kept lost memories physically alive!
I went home that night knowing the phone would ring.  I awakened at around 2:10 and about 2:20 the phone rang.  She'd made the trip on her own time and was resting more comfortably than in many years.  I asked the nurse the time of death...... 2:10 a.m.!  No tears, they were all shed throughout the past 5 years and especially the past 10 days.
Yesterday we laid her quietly and snugly between Steve and Dad surrounded by those who loved her most. It was a good day ♥

LOCKE — Virginia Tice Hewitt passed away peacefully on June 1, 2017 at the Groton Community Health Care Center in Groton, N.Y., at the end of a long journey with Alzheimer’s.

Virginia (Ginnie) was born April 21, 1922, and recently celebrated her 95th birthday. She was born in Auburn, N.Y. where she spent her early years. As the Depression set in, her dad, Neil Tice, closed his jewelry store and moved his family to Moravia, N.Y. He opened the first liquor store in the village where it continues to thrive today. Ginnie graduated from Moravia High School and continued her education at the Auburn School of Nursing where she was pinned and received her registered nursing credentials. In 1943, she married her husband of 63 years, Gordon (Buzz) Hewitt. After settling in Locke, N.Y., they raised three children and operated Hewitt Brothers Incorporated until December of 2006.

Ginnie loved golfing at Owasco Country Club, summering at Overbrook on Owasco Lake, wintering in the Florida sunshine, and enjoying every season of football, baseball, and golf in her “perch!”

She was predeceased by her parents, Ruth TenEyck and Neil Comstock Tice; her brother, Neil “Jack” Tice; her son, Stephen Hewitt, and her husband, Gordon (Buzz) Hewitt.

She is survived by her daughters, Christine (Richard) Geyer, of Farmington, N.Y., and Sandra (Lee) Hatfield, of Moravia, N.Y. She leaves five grandchildren, Richelle (Christian) Hargis, Stephen (Emily) Geyer, Jason (Meghan) Geyer, Jeffrey (Lacie) Hatfield, and Jessica Brown. Ginnie’s littlest legacies include her great-grandchildren, Julian and James Hargis, Alexandra and William Geyer, Bennett Geyer, Bailee Brown, and Jett Hatfield.

A private burial will be held at the convenience of the family.

Should friends and family desire, contributions in Ginnie’s memory may be sent to Four Town First Aid, P.O. Box 28, Moravia, NY 13118 or the Locke Volunteer Fire Department, P.O. Box 183, Locke, NY 13092.

Arrangements are with Shurtleff Funeral Home.

Mother's, Grandma's. Mima's Day

Being friends with your son's in-laws before they were in-laws is immeasurable!  We seldom have to split a holiday with them.....because we share the holiday with them!  On Mother's Day the men pretend to plan and cook. We go along with it as we make the potatoes, vegetables, appetizers and desserts and set the time and prepare the venue and fret about the weather.  They handle the meat, the alcohol and the ammunition!  

Bailee and I went to breakfast and then stopped in to visit Great Grandma for a bit.  She was taking her 12 hour nap so we left our flowers and headed home.  Upon entering the garage, the big, white roaster was bubbling and giving off the best smell, sweet smell.  We thought, "apple crisp, apple pie, cinnamon rolls......?"  We asked Papa "What was cookin'?" "Turkeys," he proudly replied.  ...............go back a few hours ...... "What do you put on the turkey?"  "Just pat it dry, rub it with butter and sprinkle with some spices."............................!

Yes Lee, cinnamon IS a spice!   Strangely enough, it was delicious.  Who needs dessert when you can have cinnamon turkey for the main course?!

Our beautiful DIL did make delicious appetizers and amazing desserts.... no bake cookies and a chocolate tart that was to die for!  Adding mac and cheese and twice baked sweet potatoes completed the entree along with my favorite cukes.  Appetizers were garlic, cheese pull apart bread , crackers and dip and shrimp...lots of shrimp.

It was literally, A....Very....Good....Day!

Nurse's Week

Soooo many nurses in my family.... My Mom, SIL, DIL, nieces, aunts, cousins and friends. I have experienced caring nurses in every level of care from finger sticks to dialysis, stitches to surgeries and new life to compassionate death. You would think this everyday interaction would harden even the softest souls... you couldn't be more wrong! ♥ you all!

With so many family members involved in the nursing profession, you'd think my dream, like other little girls, would be to join the crowd.  Nope...hospitals are my least favorite place in the world.  Pretty much until Bailee was born, all my hospital experiences sucked.  It always seemed to involve being cut open, stitched up or dying. In no instance, did I have any control!  I like being in control which I'm sure comes as no shock to anyone who might be purposefully or even by mistake.. reading this!  I live vicariously through Olivia Pope! I like to fix things. For that reason you might think, "Well, nurses fix things!"  Yep, they do the very best they can to make nasty situations better, to compensate for the lack of most Doctors semblance of bedside manner and they clean up feces and puke! ......but it's wasn't the fix I was looking for!  Thankfully, it was the fix many of my relatives and friends were......!

So many things I recall about my nurses:

At an early age I learned that an enema can transform a cantankerous child into a beautiful flower girl!

Allergy shots were best given by the local veterinarian's wife who made all things better!

Some nurses have flawless skill when drawing blood...others should only draw pictures!

Good nurses pretend to look away when weighing you in....but the number miraculously still finds it way to your chart!

Some nurses read way too much into each symptom and suggest the ER versus Pepto Bismol. :-(

One NP I know and love has the virtuous quality of entering her field "to help her friends and family" and make them feel better!

Some nurses are so empathetic they practice palliative and hospice care.....REMARKABLE!

Nurses do most of the work........................period!

Nurses make the world go round.....and round.....and round...and when you fall, they pick you up and fix what hurts... 

....So let's remember, they need compassion too..... Happy Nurse's Week to all those who chose to make us feel better....

May the 4th be with you!

Star Wars Day...Lots of friends and family celebrate their birthdays today too. Nephew Clint and niece Lyndsy and friends Sharon Weeks and Eddy Sharpsteen.  Everyone always asks me how I can remember everyone's birthdays, anniversaries and special days. It's pretty simple actually...some I just plain remember and most I write faithfully on my calendar to remind me. It's always nice to be remembered.  Face Book helps a lot and I remember the past couple of birthdays getting literally hundreds of birthday wishes. I enjoyed and appreciated every single one.

Keeping in tune with the theme of the day, it's looking a little like the "Dark Side" out there right now and the lawn needs mowing again before the Storm Troopers arrive. Off to ChewtheBacka yard! Mow the 4th be with you!

Old Because

Pretty sure I see a theme evolving in these writings.  Every day I find a new reason to justify strange phenomenons.  Although, the reasons are slowly dwindling down to the same reason most of the time.  The aging process or as I often call it, f@*+ing OLD!  Here are a few of just the latest revelations!

I know I'm old because:

• I look forward to watching Meet the Press on Sunday although I strongly dislike Chuck Todd but also amazingly enjoy politics.
• When I occasionally do apply make up to my eyelids, I apply with my finger slightly pulling the lid to the outside of my eye....and it stays there!
• The process of getting out of my recliner lacks the enthusiasm of getting in it!
• The brown spots on my hands are NOT dirt and no longer wash off :-(
• Wearing the same pair of jeans 2 days in a row is now perfectly OK. I'm actually quite tickled old people even wear jeans!
• The 4th Wednesday of each month is a fun day that I lunch with other old people and the gov't even pays me to go.. (That's how I choose to see it!).
• My bedtime is still shortly after 11 but I've actually been asleep since 9.
• I no longer stress about wearing something slightly wrinkled because I know what's under it, is in even worse shape!
• Snoring bothers me less and less because at least I know he's alive ;-)
• And the number 1 reason I know I'm old is......When folks tell me to just "Hang in there," every single body part already is :-(