Can you hear me now?

"Number Please"...those were the words I would hear each time I picked up the telephone.....back in the 50's and 60's.  I would answer by saying "628 please" (cottage number), or "429M3 please" (Lee's house) or even "Number 9 please".... that would connect me to Hewitt Brothers.  Within seconds, I could have asked..in Lily Tomlin fashion, "Is this the party to whom I'm speaking?"   It was all so very simple then!  Today, we have chosen to not have a hard-wired land line in our house. Who the hell ever thought I'd even be saying the words, "hard wired land line?"  We each have a cell phone and have chosen to have those be our only means of communication. I had recently decided that I would delve into the world of smart phones...an oxymoron for me.  Verizon is premiering the iPhone4 on their networks next week with an early introduction to it's existing customers this Thursday morning....and I mean morning.. 3 AM !  I can't believe I even entertained the idea of setting my alarm..(I'm not sure I even have an alarm,) No one is even assured they'll get one.. first come-first served! Anyway....with the new iPhone, I needed an extra data program, which of course was $20 + taxes.  The real reason I even wanted a new phone was to have a way to access Face Book and Yahoo mail while we were on the road.  The screen and fonts on my phone now are so small it frustrates me to connect and then even see the words.  So Jess said, "why don't you just get the Droid X.. It's all touch screen (which I Love) , it has Apps (OK), it's ALL screen with large fonts (cool) and we can SKYPE (see and talk to each other) each night" .  OK, Nix the iPhone and bring on the Droid.  Before we could order the Droid, we needed to upgrade my data plan.. OK, done...(we, being Jess)!  OK, really need to speak w/ a representative... done.  After all the rigamorole...my account would be charged with $323 and change..

I DON"T THINK SO!  A week of research, endless minutes conversing w/ a service representative, final phone decision made and I am now talking on...................... the same God-damned phone I've had for 2 years. I guess I'm a cheap SOB and one of the those darn dogs that are too old to teach new tricks! I think I'll see if I can get a ring tone that says, "Number Please!"

check the phone #'s on the calendar!

Giving in

Well it appears I have non-verbally acquiesced. I've started my lists. My motor home list, my grocery list, my what to do before I leave list and my list to give Jess so she knows what to do list.  AA has a 12 step program,  SH has a 5 step one.

1.     Make the ultimate travel decision        /check
2.     Begin the "list" process                       /check
3.     Prepare all bookwork & bill paying    /check  (This involves an extreme amount of the "robbing Peter to pay Paul theory")
4.     Prepare food and clothing and travel supplies
5.     Kiss Bailee good-bye and get your fat a-- in the motor home...This is just a vacation.. you're not going into the Witness Protection Program.

Oh Crap

Looks like there will  have to be a change in plans. Check this out:
http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20110127/ap_on_bi_ge/us_social_security.........Social Security can maybe remain solvent until 2037... I'm not sure whether I'm unhappy that I didn't work and contribute MORE or I'm tickled shitless that my measly penance wasn't added as I won't be getting it back anyway.  It appears I should be sowing my wild oats now ...just when I really feel like I should be put out to pasture.  Pasture isn't really such a bad thing.  As long as the grass is plentiful, there's a fence so I don't get lost and I'm free to poop anywhere at will...it actually sounds quite pleasant.  I may have to be transported to a warmer climate in the inclement months but they have rigs for that. As long as one day they don't load me in and say we're "Going to the show",,,,,,,,, I'll be fine.

The Show Story:  When Jess was little.. maybe a bit older than Bailee, she would patiently wait each Monday morning at the shop for Mr. Young (Kenny) to pull in with his truck and trailer and invite her to go along w/ him to"The Show."  She loved the ride and watching as the animals were unloaded.. Thankfully they never stayed for the festivities........................since the Show took place at the slaughter house!!!!

For better or worse

Well, Bailee is better but Jess's little daycare guy, Hunter is worse.   He must have caught Bailee's conglomeration of dribblings and spewings...Get the mucinex and delsym into him and hopefully he'll be better fast.  The joys of school and daycare and -1 one day and 35 the next.  I think all doctor and medicine bills should be sent directly to Al Gore......Global Warming .
With the "day off" for Jess, I think the girls need a trip to WalMart, where there won't be anyone sneezing coughing or puking, yeah right.  We need this week's triple S releases: Secretariat, Social Network and Saw 4. The last of which will not ever be viewed by me.  If I want to be frightened, I'll look in the mirror.  A stop at Burger King or A & W will top off our afternoon.  Catch you later!

B & G Pizzeria

Welcome to B & G Pizzeria.  All pies are handmade and homemade.....Well, they are!  We made them at home with our own four hands!  What a treat to see the smile when Bailee asks, "Can I do that Grandma?" and I respond, "Sure". She has never really been a fan of getting dirty so this was a fun experience...after the initial look of "eeew",   Bailee added all the ingredients from yeast to flour and stirred w/ all her might....when  it came time to knead......she was on a roll...literally. Her oiled hands were a bit tentative when it came to flipping. "What if I break it?"....."No problem" I replied.".it mends easily."   After a couple choruses of Volare' and some robust shouts of Mama Mia..... we had the crust ready to decorate.  What a foursome of picky eaters.  This one didn't want pepperoni and this one only cheese (guess who that was?). One didn't want peppers (me) and one wondered where the mushrooms and sausage were?  Hey for the price of our pizzas, you get what you get.  Finally it was time to chow down and it appeared the Pizza Princess wasn't fond of the sauce. She also announced that she preferred her Dad's "pancake pizza" to our freshly prepared entree'.  Papa and I were not quite sure what the hell a pancake pizza was but he ended up winning the prize when he figured out she liked round pizzas better than rectangular. So, Grandma has now asked for a round pizza pan for her birthday. Bailee is sure there must be something I want more than that...like Rapunzel or a Sponge Bob movie. I'll give it some thought !

Whiners

I am surrounded by whiners. They whine when it's cold, they whine when it's hot, they whine when it rains, they whine it snows, they whine at gas prices, they whine at food prices, they whine about white people, they whine about black people, they whine about sports and they whine about taxes.....they even whine when they have to listen to other people whine...WTH.  Give it up people.  If you don't like the weather......move. I guarantee there will something you won't like about weather there too.  It wastes a whole lot of energy to complain about things you have no control over. Now, if you could delete calories by whining, we'd be in pretty good shape around here...literally!  So let's take this week alone and turn our jeers into cheers. Wow, what a gorgeous morning it is. I'd dare say we all woke up in nice, cozy, warm beds, had hot showers, the availability of good breakfasts and hot coffee, warm clothes to wear to our cars, dry roads to commute and good health to accompany it all. So, quit your bitchin' and count your blessings. I'm really pretty sick of hearing it!

Miscellaneous

1.   4 more inches of snow last night and snowing again now
2.  Temperatures expected to dip to -15 with wind chills down to -30 in "outlying areas"
3.  Couch OUT of the motor home... commence cleaning and rearranging (I knew they could do it)
4.  Bailee down with infection trio.. sinus, respiratory and ear :-(
5.  Week-end switch with the Sperm Donor.. (Bailee's Dad)... now she can stay home and cuddle w/ her Mama
6. Jets are landing in Pittsburgh ground Big Ben
7.  Heather closes on her new home today.....very exciting !
8.  Whitney turns 17 today....Holy cow, we all survived 1 year of driving
9.  Jay safely home from South Africa with lots of tales to tell
10. A week-end in the Theater.... football, The Social Network, Little Fockers (don't
 ask where that came from)