To search or not to search

To search or not to search.. that was the question posed on the Today show this morning. http://today.msnbc.msn.com/id/43540696/ns/today-parenting_and_family/       It's been very interesting to follow the discussion...Several "discussers" (not sure that's a word) said "absolutely not." The parents right were terminated at adoption and should NOT be allowed to search.  Some stated they were unstable and incompetent....I wholeheartedly disagree... As with any discussion, not all participants should be lumped into one unstable bunch.  Many birth moms make well thought out, intelligent decisions that are in the best interest of their children.  Both of my children's circumstances fall into that category.  It has always given me a bit of peace of mind knowing that their birth moms were not drug induced children themselves spitting out babies for reasons of support, incompetency or just plain stupidity related to age, state of mind and/or loose legs!!!  So the argument against birth Moms searching doesn't hold water if you're using that criteria.  Now, do I think it's smart for a birth Mom to search?  maybe....Searching from a curiosity standpoint is understandable.  It doesn't even mean that they will take advantage of what they learn. Now, should the children search for their birth parents?  All case by case.....When adopted kids reach a certain age, they become curious.... females seem to have the urge to search more than males.  Jess was always wondering...Jeff never wondered... he knew who his parents were (us) and had absolutely NO interest in anyone but us.  Jess, even now, has a lingering interest since she has a child and is unable to give any family history on her side.  Hopefully, there will be no life threatening ailments that will facilitate this. So, I guess the bottom line is, at least in my point of view .... If it is important enough to the "kids" to consume their everyday thoughts, search if you will but I think that most of the birth parents made adult decisions and should leave well enough alone.  Just sayin'