Enabler or Inhibitor ??

Enabler or Inhibitor?

Maybe lying in bed and asking myself this question is just jumbling up the answer.  I'm beginning to think that nearly every entity in our lives is just a giant enabler.....most of all me!

Starting at the top of the food chain...our illustrious government and its entitlements:  If we (the people) give you funding for your car, your groceries, your health care, your children and your housing, what's your incentive to work....??? especially if you were never taught or shown any work ethic through role models. (enabler or inhibitor?)

Our educational system:  The mindset now is to teach to the test.  If you test poorly, you get remedial help which is enabling the schools to receive more funding because they have a higher ratio of learning disabled students. On the other hand, with common core staring down our proverbial throats, if the students test poorly, their teachers literally pay the price and and God knows their paychecks are inhibited.

When our kids were younger, most of us knew it was our responsibility to teach them the basics and show by example.... everything from respect, manners, hygiene and responsibility to tying their shoes and riding a bike. It usually transformed into delivering forgotten book bags to over helping with homework.  (Enabling or inhibiting?)

As our kids grew up, (hopefully) they continued to learn (or not)  life's important lessons. If they played sports or joined community teams, they were encouraged to win but also that it was important how you played the game. .........then everybody got a ribbon or a trophy.... So much for those lessons!

Now, we're parents of adults and grandparents of littles.  Life is tough and life is expensive. Relationships began and relationships ended.  Priorities were rearranged on their "what's important" lists and we are supposed to sit back and ask if they really need that helping hand or if , in the long run, it's better for them to struggle and modify their lives to what they have chosen as a lifestyle? This is when I lie awake at night with that tiny little devil on one shoulder and the benevolent little banker on the other. Enabler or Inhibitor? 

I've somewhat reckoned myself to how exactly the answer to that question affects me..(for once!!)  Is my philanthropy (as I justify my giving) enabling them to have and do things that would otherwise be a detriment to them if unaccomplished or unacquired or will it eventually inhibit what's left to pursue my old age pleasures?  I'm not thrilled with most answers.

I still ask myself the age old question.............................................WWBD..........(What would Buzz do?)  If it's a matter of health and welfare, do it....if it's a matter of lofty comfort and mere pleasure, they're on their own!!

But what if their comfort is my pleasure?  I predict more Tylenol pm in my future! ;-)